Watch: Desperate CNN Forces Children to Talk Politics, Gets Brutal Answers About Trump and Kamala

CNN, a network that prides itself on being "the most trusted name in news," should be taken seriously—at least according to their own branding. I know it’s hard to stifle a laugh at that claim, but it’s actually their slogan.

Anderson Cooper, similarly, is supposed to be one of CNN's more reputable reporters. I’ll give CNN supporters this point, though they should admit that it’s not a particularly high bar, considering this is the same network that previously employed Don Lemon and Chris Cuomo as prime-time hosts—back-to-back, no less.

To be fair, Cooper has established his credentials by reporting from war zones and crisis areas. For those who remember the devastation of Hurricane Katrina, Cooper standing in the floodwaters, visibly emotional in the midst of the chaos, is an unforgettable image.

Now, though, Cooper mostly works from the studio, where he recently faced another “storm”—though a very different one. Hurricane Helene, a Category 4 storm, made landfall on Thursday and was described by CNN as "the strongest hurricane on record to slam into Florida's Big Bend."

So what was Anderson Cooper talking about on air Wednesday night, just before the hurricane hit? Naturally, it was the opinions of 10- and 11-year-olds regarding the two major presidential nominees: Democrat Kamala Harris and Republican Donald Trump.

It’s unlikely that this concept was Anderson’s brainchild, but as a consummate professional, Cooper presented it as a “special report” on “what the voters of tomorrow make of the campaign today,” as per the CNN transcript.

Cooper mentioned that his team had "teamed up with a renowned political scientist from Stanford and a psychologist at Arizona State University to design and conduct a study looking at polarization among fourth graders.” He somehow managed to keep a straight face while saying this—a feat considering his past giggle fits over absurd topics. (A personal favorite is his on-air breakdown while reporting about French actor Gerard Depardieu relieving himself in an inappropriate place during a flight, but everyone has their own highlights.)

“Our experts asked us to find three schools,” Cooper explained, “one from a town that went heavily for President Biden in the last election, one that went big for former President Trump in 2020, and one in an area about evenly split.” Thus began an almost ten-minute (!) segment on how fourth- and fifth-graders view the Harris-Trump matchup.

Spoiler alert: They didn’t say anything meaningful, even if their honesty was entertaining!

Here’s a representative clip of the type of interaction CNN had with these kids:

The segment, which lasted for nine and a half minutes, did not yield anything useful—because they’re kids. These middle-schoolers are still at least seven years away from being eligible to vote. Seven years ago, these children were likely the same age where parents were putting plastic protectors in wall sockets so they wouldn’t stick a fork in there for fun.

If you are closer to needing protection from self-electrocution than you are to voting, what you think about a presidential election isn’t important. Now write that 100 times on the chalkboard—or iPad, whatever kids use these days.

But really, the problem doesn’t lie with the kids. It’s not the fault of the girl who suggested Harris was more selfish “because girls are a little bit dramatic sometimes.” Later, a boy added that he disliked Trump because “I mean, come on, he went to like jail, I mean.”

Cooper added in a voice-over: “To be clear, while Trump was booked and released from jail, he didn’t spend time behind bars. Thirty-two percent of all students brought up the former president’s legal issues. In general, kids who said they’d support Donald Trump did not see his legal problems as a disqualifier.”

This definitely wasn’t groundbreaking information for political analysts. Yet it was presented completely seriously, with no hint of humor or skepticism. Unlike Cooper's “Ridiculist”—a segment dedicated to bizarre news stories—this wasn’t treated as comic relief.

Instead, nearly ten minutes were devoted to the opinions of kids who have less influence on this election than their deceased great-great-grandfather—if said great-great-grandfather was a registered voter in Chicago. (He’s probably still reliably voting Democrat. Allegedly, cough, cough.)

This kind of absurd exercise raises the question: why not extend this approach to other areas? For example, before the prestigious film publication Sight and Sound compiles its next list of the top 10 films of all time, perhaps they could have 10- and 11-year-olds review the top two American films—Alfred Hitchcock’s Vertigo and Orson Welles’ Citizen Kane—alongside Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: Secret of the Ooze from 1991 (yes, the one with Vanilla Ice and his "Ninja Rap" cameo).

A ten-minute segment on kids’ opinions of those films might prove amusing. Could TMNT II: Secret of the Ooze replace Hitchcock and Welles at the top of the list? No. Would it be absurd for someone to even attempt such a comparison? Absolutely.

This may seem like an exaggerated analogy, but it didn’t require much of a stretch. These children are just parroting their parents, teachers, television, and social media, and perhaps not even in that order.

While various explanations were given for dedicating serious airtime to this “study,” the real reason was simply to introduce a new angle into election coverage by involving children. And the result? They were ill-informed. Which is precisely why 11-year-olds don’t have the right to vote.

Thank you, Anderson Cooper and the CNN team, for once again reminding us why kids aren't eligible to vote. But there's a real hurricane happening now, and you actually have the experience to report on that. Maybe focus on the storm, and leave the kids to their parents. Just a suggestion, Anderson.